she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
