What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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