Im at strip club and am horny
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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