It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
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I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
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Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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