You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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