im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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