Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Found your dick twin last night
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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