PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
