so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
We talked him into tasing himself.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
