Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
