Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
