That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
