4 words: hood of his car
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Go christen that room with your naked body.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
