Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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