He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
