Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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