Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
It's rum buckets o'clock
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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