Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Randomize
