i love accidental penises.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize