awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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