just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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