apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
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