if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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