No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Randomize
