i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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