I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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