just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
