is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
