Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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