My first STD was from a foam party
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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