He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
