You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
