there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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