Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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