Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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