used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
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