I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
