He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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