Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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