god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize