A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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