He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize