so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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