You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
