if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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