Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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