Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Randomize
