She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
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Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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