When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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