there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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